Thursday, March 11, 2010

Trust - where does it begin?

My father used to love to tell a story about me. I heard it many times over the years. When I was a baby (under a year) both my parents worked and an older lady named Mary came to our house to watch my brother and me. I was just learning to walk and I loved to climb. I would climb onto the coffee table and toddle to Mary at the other end. Then I would jump into her arms. I'd laugh and do it again and again.

When my parents were home, I would still play my game. I would climb onto the coffee table, toddle to the end and then jump. But no one was there to catch me. My parents knew about the game but they thought it was funnier to watch me jump off the coffee table. And they'd laugh even more when I'd stop crying and then do it again.

As I grew up, I wondered why my parents would laugh about that story. I felt stupid whenever people would laugh at me. Then I became a parent and later a grandparent.

WHAT WERE MY PARENTS THINKING???!?!?! Who in their right mind lets a baby walk off the end of a coffee table knowing the baby would fall onto the wood floor.?!?!

That baby trusted that someone was going to catch her. That baby had experienced being caught and had fun and thought anyone would catch her. Instead of learning trust so that she could continue to trust as she grew, she learned that not everyone could be trusted and people were going to laugh at her when she fell and cried.

I know there were other incidents that cemented my inability to trust others but I think this was the root. My life motto is "You can get bitter or you can get better". I wanted to be a different parent to my children. When they cried, I was there. When they were hurt, I was there. When they needed me, I was there.

I knew that trusting me, their mom, was a key for them to be able to trust God, their heavenly Father, and then their husband

For me, learning to trust has always been a long road. It took me a long time to trust Kevin and a long time to trust God. I was always afraid that I'd fall and He wouldn't catch me.

We parents don't always realize the impact we have on our children. We don't realize the depth we can hurt or build up our children. I am so thankful for the opportunity to help build trust in my grandkids.

That's my thinking. What do you think?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I had never heard that story. It gives me a sad insight into our favorite Ruth. I wish we could have been there to catch you...but of course the Lord was there and you did fall into His arms years later.
love you.
Beel and Igglis

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Longview, Texas
In the autumn of my life, I am very content.